Schiiiiddd (How Melo is about to pull a D. Rose with a bigger ski mask bruh)

"C'mon dawg! I need to take a break!"

Douglas Horton, the famous religious leader, once said, “Desperation is like stealing from the Mafia: you stand a good chance of attracting the wrong attention.” Doris Lessing, the British novelist and poet, gave it to us like this, “Borrowing is not much better than begging; just as lending with interest is not much better than stealing.” Then Patrick Leahy, the Senator from Vermont, shut the buildin’ down with, “Stealing is stealing. I don’t care if it’s on the Internet or you’re breaking into a warehouse somewhere – it’s theft.”

You’re right playboy and you can add to that theft in the freakin’ NBA too! Now the word out of New York is that Melo may shut it down for the remainder of the season due to soreness in his left knee which has been botherin’ him since the second game of the season. He sat out of that aggravated assault Detroit put on them Friday night with the same excuse.

Let’s keep it real or all the way 100, whichever comes 1^st! These young boyz out here really chap my butt, and that’s the edited version, by not playin'. These cats find more reasons to sit down than Big Momma tryin’ to get out of wearin’ a thong on New Year’s eve.

These cats are making 10 times what boyz made 25 years ago and they can't play. Boyz have been gettin' hurt or havin' sore knees for years but they played anyway. Why? Because it was their job!

Now this dun is in his first year of a $124 MILLION contract and he already wants to shut it down 35 games in. Don’t give me the soreness BS bruh! It’s your freakin’ job. If you can play then you gotta play! They’re payin’ you all of that bread because you’re good for business playboy. They’ve sold tickets to see you play, they’ve sold cable subscriptions to see you play not the dun playin’ behind you.

Derrick Rose was on that same foolishness last year. Here’s my idiot diehard fan that can’t tell the difference between salt and pepper screamin’ from the top of his lungs. “Man if he’s hurt then he needs to sit out! He's gonna ruin his career if he keeps playin’!” Who are you worried about, your bread or Melo? Melo’s bread is guaranteed whether he plays or not pimpin’! He’s gonna collect a check whether he’s got on a uniform or a pair of Red Bottoms playa. You’re the nut payin’ for tickets and he’s not playin’.

Would you still buy Katy Perry tickets if they told you that her homegirl Ashley was singin’ instead? Would you go see Drake if his cousin Octavius was rappin’ instead? Absolutely not! So why would you be cool with continuin’ to show up to Knicks games if the dun you paid to see was chillin’ on the sideline wearin’ a ski mask robbin' the joint?

And don’t tell me anything else about that dun’s career either. He’s freakin’ 30 years old and will be 35 when this current contract expires. So this is probably the last contract he’ll ever sign. Especially, if he’s fallin’ apart now. So what is he savin’ himself from? Havin’ to actually earn his freakin’ paycheck like the rest of the folks out here. If he completely nose dives the bread is guaranteed. So he's got nothin' to lose.

If I was James Dolan that dun would be out there runnin’ around on his freakin’ elbows earnin’ that $124 million bruh and we’re 5-30? Schiiiiiiiiddd! For all of you suburbanites and cats that grew up in rural America, that means "You outta yo rabbit "A" mind if you think I'm goin' for that.That dun is gonna play with the lights off up in that piece. As a matter of fact, I’m movin’ LaLa, his kid and her two freeloadin' homegirls into Madison Square Garden for the remainder of that contract. They’ll be in that joint bumpin’ that ole P. Diddy “Bad Boy 4-Life” We ain’t Go-in No-Where until that contract is up.

You better go head on talkin’ about shuttin’ it down! Not with $124 million on the table and boyz have already paid for season tickets. Not here playboy! Stop me when I start lyin’!

Holla At Ya Boy!
JayGravesReport
#thebestdressedmaninmedia
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The caption under the photo isn’t real but its REAL talk!   

Suckas (How Melo & Phil got Knicks fans believin' in the tooth fairy this mornin')

Trust me dawg! We got these suckas now!"

T.S. Eliot, the famous essayist, publisher and playwright, once said, “It is obvious that we can no more explain a passion to a person who has never experienced it than we can explain light to the blind.” George Bernard Shaw, the Irish playwright, broke it down like this, “No question is so difficult to answer as that to which the answer is obvious.” Then George Orwell, the English novelist, shut the buildin’ down with, “We have now sunk to a depth at which restatement of the obvious is the first duty of intelligent men.”

Let me see a show of hands of all of the duns that thought Melo was gonna leave New York? As a matter of fact, the suckas that really thought that he was gonna leave $120+ million on the table stand on your head and spin around 122 million times because that’s what he signed for. When they put the offer on the hood of the car it was obvious that ole boy wasn’t goin’ anywhere playboy.

Let’s keep it real or all the way 100, whichever comes 1^st! Melo is Melo! Better known as The Ball Stoppa, the Black Hole of Basketball. If you give him the ball it ain’t comin’ back your way playa. He’s gonna give you a 46 point night but he’s gonna give up 42 on the other end. He’s the same dun that has only been out of the first round of the playoffs but once or twice in his freakin' career. You do the math playa.

So for all of the clowns really believin’ that Melo was flirtin’ with leavin’ because he wanted to win a championship obviously doesn’t know a thing about basketball. You can’t win a championship with a dun that doesn’t share the ball and refuses to play defense. Stop it!

Here’s my diehard New York Knick fan rockin’ the Melo jersey sittin’ next to Spike Lee, “Yo Jay you’re the sucka son! Melo is back and Phil is gonna get him right kid! He’s gonna change the way he plays the game and the Knicks are gonna win a championship with him!”

Y’all act like Phil is the head coach out there bruh! He already told you that he was gonna be the part-time President of the New York Knicks. When he signed his deal for $12 million a year he told you that he was goin’ to be in LA as much as he was goin’ to be in New York. Derrick Fisher is the head coach playa not Phil. He can’t be the president and the head coach livin’ in LA half the time. Wake up bruh!

Then you’re hollerin’ about Melo changin’. You sound like the broad that starts datin’ a cat that she really doesn’t like but says that she’s gonna change him. You can’t change a grown man. He is who he is when you hook up with him. You gotta take it or leave it. Melo knows how to play the game one way and it works for him. Shoot the darn ball! And that’s the edited version.

Why do I say that it works? Because the dun just signed a $122 million contract to play basketball. It’s workin’ like a son of a gun. And that’s the edited version again!

"Bout to kill 'em now playa!"

Stop with all of this “he wanted to win a championship” foolishness. Everybody’s not in it to win a championship. That’s real talk! Championships are a TEAM award that are won by great front offices and organizations. The only way you’re gonna win a title is if you’ve been blessed enough to play for a well-run organization at the right time. The Knicks organization is garbage and has been for more than 41 years.

Here’s my Knicks fan again, “Jay you’re a sucka son!! Phil is back and he’s gonna show the Knicks how to win! How can you say that we’re a garbage organization?” Like all of the old hustlas used to say, “The truth is in the details playa!”

Anytime you pay a dun $12 million to run your organization that told you in the interview that he wasn’t gonna be in town but half the time you’re poorly run. Anytime you pay a rookie head coach that just took his uniform off last month $5 million a year when the average head coach makes between $2 and $3 million a year the front office is insane. Anytime you pay a dun $122 million that is a ball stopper that refuses to play defense and you continue to lie to fans by tellin’ them you wanna win a championship you’re a garbage organization.

Just tell the fans what you’re really tryin’ to do playboy, sell tickets, ad space and cable subscriptions. After all, James Dolan is the President and CEO of Cablevision. If I can get these suckas to believe that we’re really tryin’ to win then they’ll keep showin’ up and sellin’ the joint out and for the clowns that can’t get into the buildin’ they can watch it on their new Cablevision box.

In Dolan’s mind he’s winnin’! Just like Jerry Jones of the Cowboys and Thomas Ricketts that owns the freakin’ Cubs! These duns are winnin’ as long as sucker fans keep believin’ that they’ve got a chance. So by doin’ things that look good it’s like puttin’ gasoline on the fire that keeps them interested for decades. Because there isn’t a Knick fan alive today that doesn’t think Phil is the answer and he’s sittin’ at his desk this mornin’ at the crib on a webcast pullin’ a Sam Rothstein. He’s got on a shirt, tie and blazer but he’s butt naked from the waist down. And all of the Knicks fans are waitin' for the tooth fairy to show up. Stop me when I start lyin’!

Holla At Ya Boy!
JayGravesReport
#thebestdressedmaninmedia
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The caption under the photo isn’t real but its REAL talk!  

Playin' the Field (Why Melo is out here hollerin' at broads knowin' he's goin' back to NY)

"Yeah bruh I'm on that foolishness too!"

Tony Robbins, the motivational speaker, once said, “Remember, a real decision is measured by the fact that you've taken new action. If there's no action, you haven't truly decided.” Amelia Earhart gave it to us like this, “The most difficult thing is the decision to act, the restis merely tenacity. The fears are paper tigers. You can do anything you decide to do. You can act to change and control your life; and the procedure, the process is its own reward.” Then Plato jumped out of the whip in the middle of traffic and said, “A good decision is based on knowledge and not on numbers.”

Here’s the problem playboy, they weren’t shootin’ hoop when Plato was spittin’ knowledge and he darn sure didn’t know Melo! To suggest that a decision is based on knowledge and not numbers when talkin’ about this dun or pro sports in general is ridiculous. The Knicks can offer him a max deal worth $129 million over a five year period and the other cats can only offer him $96 million over four years. Now on some real talk, it’s all semantics and for all you simple minded individuals its all the same just depending upon how you wanna slice up Big Momma’s peach cobbler.

Let’s keep it real or all the way 100, whichever comes 1^st! Why is this dun out here playin’ the field knowin’ that he’s gonna stay in New York! He’s out here hollerin’ at broads cause they’re hollerin’! He’s in Chi hollerin’ at the broad on the L train one day. Then he’s in Houston hangin’ out in the Third Ward talkin’ to this “Geto” chick that’s Scarface’s little sister’s best friend and we all know that her mind is playin’ tricks on her. The next thing you hear is this dun’s in LA screamin’ at this broad from Compton “With” crazy“Attitude” because her older brother and his friends didn’t like the police.

What’s trips me out about this cat is that he knows that he ain’t goin’ “no-where” like Puffy. Stop it! Just stop it bruh and everybody else knows that he ain’t goin’ nowhere either. That’s why D. Rose wasn’t tryin’ to get involved with all of the courtin’ and recruitin’ process. My man is from Englewood,south side of the Chi playboy where they keep it a 100 on GP.

Rose was like, “Man that dun ain’t comin’ out here! And if he does, he ain’t gone play no defense so what’s the point? We need another scorer not another scorer that’s gonna give up as much as he scores. Don’t involve me in that foolishness and unless they’re changin’ the rules to allow two balls on offense at a time the black hole is real pimpin’.”

You already know that Melo will drop 42 on aboy and give up 38! So why would D. Rose, Tibbs or Joakim want that type of frustration every night? Then who’s the fool that really thinks Melo and Kobe can co-exist and there isn’t but one ball? Stop it! Everybody in that situation includin’ Melo knows that Kobe still thinks that he’s 25 and is gonna wanna put boyz on his back all of the time. The Mamba is still the same cat that will talk crazy as hell to boy in a minute through the media and Melo is from Baltimore. So why is B-Mo relevant in this discussion? Because you already know that Kobe will end up in his locker with his lip swollen lookin’ like Hitch the first time he tries that foolishness with a real cat. So why are we even wastin’ time with this too?

This is the kicker right here bruh! This cat knows all the time that he’s not goin’ anywhere so he plants his out clause early. Let me give you an old wise ghetto colloquialism so that you can always recognize game while it’s bein’ ran, “The truth is always in the details playboy!” And if you don’t put the playboy on the end you haven’t said anything!

He says that my kid really likes New York! Red flag of truth inside the game bruh! His kid is like freakin’ 6 or 7 years old! He’sgonna like where ever mom and dad are! It’s not like he’s a freakin’ teenager and he’s got a gang of cats he’s been knowin’ all of his life with a chick he’s kickin’ it with. He’s freakin’ 6 for cryin’ out loud!

I’ve got kids and at that age the only friends they’ve got are the duns in their class and it changes every 20 minutes on who they're cool with. Next week he’s gonna have a new best friend and all he knows about New Yorkis the crib, the ride and school. So stop with that foolishness!

If you want the Knicks to be jealous, chase you out to LA and beg you to come home. Okay they did it! Now stop hollerin’ at all of these foreign broads before you catch somethin’ and mess up a good thing.

I keep hearin’ all of these cats out here screamin’ that Melo wants to win a title! Yeah and Justin Timberlake, Jon B., Robin Thick and Hall and Oates want to be black and Michael Jackson wanted to be white so bad that he kept cuttin’ at his nose until it became a transformer bruh. It is what it is and Melo is who he is. That dun isn’t gonna win a title where ever he goes because he’s the black hole and he knows it.

You can’t all of a sudden change who you are and you’re a grown freakin’ man that’s been doin’ it one way all of your life. He’s a scorer that doesn’t play defense and it doesn’t matter where he plays he won’t win a title because it takes team basketball to win at that level. Melo is about Melo so stop playin’ and take the $129 million and sit yo butt down somewhere. And that’s the edited version. Stop me when I start lyin’!

Holla At Ya Boy!

JayGravesReport
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The caption under the photo isn’t real butits REAL talk!