Straight Clownin' (How Steph Curry pulled a Bozo on a boy down in Houston)

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As I’m gettin’ my usual Saturday mornin’ debate in at the barber shop these old timers playin’ dominoes in the back start arguin’ about boyz knowin’ everything. Oscar Wilde, the 19^th century Irish author, playwright and poet, stood up and said, “The old believe everything, the middle-aged suspect everything, the young know everything.” Isaac Asimov, the author and biochemistry professor, slammed the bones down and shouted, “People who think they know everything are a great annoyance to those of us who do.” Then Albert Einstein leaned back in his chair and quietly said in his pimp voice, “Look deep into nature, and then you will understand everything better.”

Well playas…boyz down at the Toyota Center on Saturday night will tell you to look deep into Steph Curry and you will see a dun that did everything better. Ole boy went to work on the Houston Rockets as the Golden State Warriors beat the brakes off of them 115-80 to take a 3-0 lead in the Western Conference Finals.

Let’s keep it real or all the way 100, whichever comes 1^st! Steph Curry did everything but wash a boy'z Bentley and take the tickets last night bruh! He opened the gym, turned on the lights, swept the floor and worked the concession stand. He even served drinks in the suites. Steph was literally unstoppable! This dun was knockin’ down 3’s like triplets, pigs, suits, Stooges and death bruh. Ole boy finished the night 7 of 9 from downtown with 40 points, 7 dimes and 5 rebounds.

There was nothin’ the Rockets could do with him. He was dribblin’ through traffic like Curly Neal, shootin’ 3’s like Reggie Miller in the Garden and he even boxed out ole dull Buster Brown in the paint and drew the foul like Kareem. I had to put my hat and coat on when he pulled the George Gervin figure roll out. He was officially clownin’ these fools complete with the big nose, shoes and water spittin’ flower. They needed to put him in a straitjacket before he hurt himself bruh!

"C'mon dawg! You didn't want it!"

I’ve never seen a team look as bad as the Houston Rockets and get to the Conference Finals. The Clippers completely wet the bed and soiled the mattress to let them get this far! Sure, the first two games of the series they only lost by a total of 5 points on the road. However, that was because the Runnin’ Beard was literally carryin’ these boyz on his hip like a broad in the projects. He’s gotta put up ridiculous numbers just for them to be in the joint.

He only scored 17 points in Game 3 and that was 25 points shy of what his freeloadin’ teammates needed. I will say that Buster Brown played well in Games 2 and 3. He had 19 points and 17 rebounds in Game 2 and 17 and 17 in Game 3 but the rest of those duns are bein’ carried around the playground like the flu.

It’s a freakin’ shame that a boy gets to the Western Conference Finals and gets clowned like Bozo’s Bucket No.6 with Ringmaster Ned runnin’ interference! Stop me when I start lyin’!

Playas Thesaurus:
1) Dun: noun – the person in question, dude, guy, girl, etc. It’s whoever I’m talkin’ about bruh and its non-gender specific.
2) Dull: adjective – to be the dun that boyz are just disgusted with. He’s the dude that really don’t want around but they’ve gotta let him hang out because Big Momma said to look out for him.
3) Buster Brown: noun – Dwight Howard. I started callin’ that dun Buster Brown when he started stringin’ Orlando out and he wouldn’t just tell them what he was goin’ to do. Dull!!!
4) Runnin’ Beard: noun – James Harden
Holla At Ya Boy!
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