Wood Paneling (How the Pacers pulled up in Portland in a old pimp's hooptie and fell short)

"Hey! I saw the space ship first!"

Jack LaLamme, the godfather of fitness, once said, “We don’t know all the answers. If we knew all the answers we’d be bored, wouldn’t we? We keep looking, searching, trying to get more knowledge.” W.H. Auden, the famous poet, gave it to us like this, “The ear tends to be lazy, craves the familiar and is shocked by the unexpected; the eye, on the other hand, tends to be impatient, craves the novel and is bored by repetition.” Then Viggo Mortenson, the famous actor and poet, ended the conversation with, “There’s no excuse to be bored. Sad, yes. Angry, yes. Crazy, yes. But there’s no excuse for boredom, ever.”

Well playboy…not unless you were watchin’ the Pacers and the Trailblazers on Thursday night tryin’ to imitate a high school basketball game in the first quarter of an 88-82 Portland win. At the end of the first quarter it was 16-14 bruh! I could have sworn that I was watchin’ the 1982 Indiana High School State Semi-State game between Western Boone and Gary Roosevelt. I was so bored you could have robbed me with a butter knife and fire crackers.

Let’s keep it real or all the way 100, whichever comes 1^st! The Pacers did improve on the defensive end of the floor from Tuesday night when they gave up 116 to boy in Phoenix. However, they forgot how to put the joint in the bucket on the other end. They got ran out of the gym in the desert because they were drivin’ Uncle Leroy’s 1975 Deuce and a Quarter and givin’ the rock up all night. Then they show up in Portland pushin’ Big Momma’s boyfriend’s 1973 Buick Station Wagon with the wood paneling still givin’ up the rock bruh.

"And you better not scratch it! Ya young punks!"

They were movin’ even slower and still bein’ generous with the ball. They only managed 82 points but gave the joint up 17 times and got hit for 19 fast break points. That’s like bein’ in a street fight and only throwin’ a few punches but givin’ a boy wide open shots to your jaw and expectin’ to walk away with braggin’ rights.

The crazy thing is the Pacers still had a shot to win the game! They hung around like flies at a family reunion the entire night but turnovers and givin’ up easy buckets in transition killed them.

Can you imagine the Pacers pullin’ up in an old station wagon bruh? Roy could actually stretch out in that joint. Hurry up and give it back to ole boy that’s hangin’ out with Big Momma because boyz were lucky that he even got out of the ride in Portland. I was shocked to see him score 9 points and grab 7 boards with all of that room in the ride. Rodney Stuckey led the fellas with 16 and the big homie with the “Wish Factor”, D. West, put up 13.

Did you see him give Robin Lopez the business and push him off of him and out of bounds? It looked like they got tangled up under the rack but the real G’s out here already know that D. West was tellin’ that dun to get up off of him and go take a bath. Lopez looks like some homeless cat that just ran out on the floor and got in the way. I would have pushed that dun off of me too. You got way too much bread to walk around lookin’ like that bruh. I was fightin’ mad just lookin’ at him.

Hopefully the Pacers turn in the station wagon and pick up something with some speed and serviceable seat belts before they get to Sacramento tonight! Stop me when I start lyin’!

Holla At Ya Boy!
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The caption under the photo isn’t real but its REAL talk!