Hardwood Floors (Why the dull media rides the SEC's jock & nobody EVER questions the foolishness)

"Y'all know how this works boyz! Now we're back in the Top 25!"

Roger Ebert once said, “Your intellect may be confused, but your emotions will never lie to you.” Baltasar Gracian, the 17^th century Spanish writer and philosopher, was on somethin’ real when he said, “A single lie destroys a whole reputation of integrity.” Then Winston Churchill hit boyz off with a head banger when he said, “A lie gets halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to get its pants on.”

Well if that’s the case then this SEC lie is sprintin’ down the street butt naked right now bruh! I’m so tired of these dull Associated Press writers lyin’ to boyz every year with these wack polls tryin’ to tell us that the SEC as a conference from top to bottom is so great. Every year these clowns, on hype alone, start rankin’ these duns in the Top 25 on GP because they’ve got SEC plastered on their helmets and jerseys.

South Carolina, like every year, started the season off sittin’ at No.9 and then got the breaks beat off of them week 1 by Texas A&M. The followin’ week they were sittin’ at No.24 about to fall off of the Top 25 cruise liner. Then they beat Georgia and go all the way back to the VIP lounge to No.13 the followin’ week.

In the meantime No. 18 Mizzou gets pistol whipped by ole dull Indiana at the crib last week and falls completely off of the freakin’ ship and is drownin’ in the ocean. Then they show up at Williams-Brice Stadium in Columbia and beats the Ole Ball Coach and Co. 21-20 yesterday. So you’re tellin’ me that a dun that got beat by freakin’ Indiana at home is good enough to go on the road in the vaunted SEC and win after bein’ down 20-7 in the fourth quarter? You and everybody tryin’ to tell me that is smokin’ crack, shootin' heroin and eatin’ mushrooms at the same time!

Let’s keep it real or all the way 100, whichever comes 1^st! I’ve been tellin’ you boyz for the past 6 or 7 years that the ENTIRE conference wasn’t good. There are 14 teams in the conference and they all aren’t winnin’ national championships. On some real talk, those 7 straight BCS titles were won by 4 schools bruh not by 7 different Joe’s! The 4 that are actually payin’ at Shoney’s are Alabama, LSU, Florida and Auburn. The rest of those duns are eatin’ off of their plates playboy.

As a matter of fact, 5 of the 7 were won by two cats! Alabama won 3 and Florida has won 2! So stop chantin’ SEC if you aren’t one of those schools. You’re the cat that gets to ride to school with the most popular kid on campus but he doesn’t even want you in the car with him. Big Momma told him that he had to pick you up because you live next door and it wouldn’t be right of him not to claim you. While the Kentucky fan is hollerin’ SEC, SEC, the duns from Alabama are tryin’ to disassociate themselves from them but they can’t because of Big Momma.

Clowns that attach themselves to someone else’s success are the suckas that are always gettin’ into the party on their boy’s strength. "I'm with him dawg!" I saw an Ole Miss fan high fivin’ a Vandy fan as a cat from Mississippi State pulls up with some duns from Kentucky, Tennessee, Arkansas, South Carolina and Mizzou in the ride talkin’ trash (edited version). They were all goin’ to a boy from Texas A&M’s crib that’s married to a girl from Georgia to celebrate the success of the SEC. When they got there somebody said, “Put the championship rings on the table that we’ve been won over the past 50 year’s bruh!” All you heard was three coins and some lent hit the table. Arkansas had one in 1964, Georgia in 1980 and Tennessee in 1998. Everybody else just stood there lookin’ crazy. And keep in mind that Arkansas wasn't even in the SEC at the time. They were in the Southwest Conference. I'm just sayin'!

So when these duns in the media try to tell you that the SEC is better from top to bottom pull this joint up playboy. When are we goin’ to realize that Vanderbilt’s success or failure has absolutely nothin’ to do with Alabama’s? Just like Iowa State bein’ horrible has nothin’ to do with Oklahoma bein’ a powerhouse every year. They both play the schedules that are in front of them and they either win or lose the freakin’ games. It doesn’t matter what conference they’re in. Have you seen Alabama’s schedule over the past few years bruh? I’m just sayin’! They’ve been cake walkin’ to national titles.

Now that Mizzou has gone to South Carolina and beaten a team that was at best suspect from day one but were ranked No.13, they’ll bounce right back up into the promenade deck of the Top 25 cruise ship this week like they never lost to ole dull Indiana. That’s the foolishness that I’m talkin’ about playa! Georgia barely got out of Sanford Stadium alive (35-32) yesterday against a Tennessee team that got destroyed by Oklahoma two weeks ago.

It’s all subjective and nobody is willin’ to see the lies for what they are. No way does a Top 25 team lose to Indiana at the crib and then go on the road the followin’ week and beats a Top 13 team! You’re tryin’ to sell me a vacuum cleaner and I’ve got hardwood floors pimpin’! Now does any of this have any barrin' on the Final Four at the end of the year? It just may because the duns on the committee that haven't been watchin' college football close enough will look at these foul rankings to gauge their top teams. Stop me when I start lyin’!

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The caption under the photo isn’t real but its REAL talk!