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| "Look here bruh, I didn't sign up for this foolishness!" |
Og Mandino, the author of 'The Greatest Salesman in the World,' once said, "Sound character provides the power with which a person may ride the emergencies of life instead of being overwhelmed by them. Failure is... the highway to success." Friedrich Nietzsche, the German philosopher, gave it to us like this, "The individual has always had to struggle to keep from being overwhelmed by the tribe. If you try it, you will be lonely often, and sometimes frightened. But no price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself." Then Phoebe Snow, the famous singer and songwriter, shut the buildin' down when she spit, "Sometimes when you're overwhelmed by a situation - when you're in the darkest of darkness - that's when your priorities are reordered."
Well playas...Matt Hasselbeck is in the darkest of darkness right now and he's reorderin' his priorities! Should I or shouldn't I get out of the freakin' bed this week and help these duns out. Why? Because I didn't sign up for this playboy. Ole boy, a forty year old quarterback, didn't sign up to actually play 6 full football games bruh! Now he's full tilt and can't stop the train from rollin' down hill. In the last two weeks he's gotten the brakes beat off of him in a 45-10 drubbin' out in Pittsburgh and then in a 51-16 blastin' down in Jacksonville! That dun has stayed on his back more than a workin' girl in Vegas!
Let's keep it real or all the way 100, whichever comes 1st! The back up quarterback, at 40, didn't sign up to actually play bruh! He signed up to hold the clip board and look stuff up for a boy. When they hollered at him he was like, "Aw bruh, you want me to back up who? Andrew Luck? Fa Sho!!! That duns like 26!!! He'll never be hurt! And if he does get banged up he'll only be out a week! Heck ya, I'll take it! That's easy money! How much? Three million dollars!!! Where do I sign?"
Think about it bruh. The back up signs up to play when a boy gets his chin strap knocked off! So he's in for a play or two while the equipment staff gets a boy a new one. How bout when a boy loses his shoe on a scramble or gets pushed out of bounds. But they don't sign up at freakin' 40 to play 6 full games!!!
That's like askin' a dun with a learner's permit to drive a shipment of nitroglycerin across the country in a semi alone!!! He's good on the open road in the desert with no traffic. But now Hasselback is in the mountains with no map, no GPS and he can’t figure out how to turn on the headlights on this new boy! All of that professional driver's trainin' is supposed to kick in right now. He vaguely remembers it but he can't get to it because his body won't respond. Why? Because he's 40!!!
That dun is so swollen up today that he looks like he's got elephantiasis! He's bathin' in Ben Gay and Epson Salt and still can't stand up! If I were him I'd show up in Grigson's (GM) office butt naked with a pair of tub socks on and street shoes foamin' at the mouth to tell him that if Luck doesn't play this week I quit! And you can keep the last three game checks playa. I signed up to hold a clip board and y’all gettin' me killed out here.
On some real talk playas, this isn't a Pagano screw up! It's a Grigson screw up! Why? Because he went out and bought the freakin' groceries. Why on earth would you sign a dun old enough to be on Soul Train in it's hay day or at least old enough to watch it live as a back up in the NFL in 2015?
Sure, Hasselback isn't the reason why the Colts stink on defense but it's an example of a dun (Grigson) buyin' groceries while he's hungry. The Colts are low on talent all over the field and now your back up needs a back up because he's too old to get out of harms way. And I know that he's 4-2 as a starter but the dun is shot right now! Why? Because he's 40!!!!!!!
So let me get this straight bruh! You've got a 40 year old that's banged up and then behind him you've got Michelangelo's half brother backin' him up? The defense stinks because it’s got no depth either. And you blamin' who for this foolishness? Pagano? Naw playa! This is on the dun buyin' the groceries! Stop me when I start lyin'!
Playas Thesaurus:
1) Spit: verb - to say
2) Dun: noun - the person in question, dude, guy, etc. It's whoever I'm talkin' about and its non-gender specific.
Holla At Ya Boy!
JayGravesReport
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The caption under the photo isn’t real but its REAL talk!
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