El DeBarge (How Steph Curry had boyz fooled thinkin' that light skin and curly hair was back)

"I thought we were back bruh but they got us shook!"

As I’m standin’ out in front of the “Q” choppin’ it up with some REAL LIVE Cleveland cats I over hear boyz debatin’ the essence of work ethic. Lisa Leslie jumped out of the whip and said, “Everyone talks about age, but it’s not about age. It’s about work ethic. Winning never gets old.” Will Smith let her finish before he said, “I’ve viewed myself as slightly above average in talent. And where I excel is ridiculous, sickening work ethic.” Then some dun named Tiger Woods pulled up in a golf cart and spit this, “People don’t understand that when I grew up, I was never the most talented. I was never the biggest. I was never the fastest. I certainly was never the strongest. The only thing I had was my work ethic, and that’s been what has gotten me this far.”

Well playas…as a team the Cleveland Cavaliers aren’t most talented, the biggest or the fastest but they definitely have the most work ethic. Golden State entered the playoffs like some spoiled brats comin’ off of winnin’ 67 games in the regular season and thought boyz were just gonna roll over and give them the championship. But the Cavs are literally punchin’ these cats in the mouth right now bruh. For three games that have systematically dismantled these cats and now they’ve got these boyz walkin’ around lookin’ like zombies.

Here’s Draymond yesterday lookin’ like a boy walkin’ up and down the street lookin’ for his bike, “They’re playing like a team that’s desperate and needs something. We’re playing like a team that’s not desperate and got something.” Yeah they’ve got your Huffy right now poppin’ wheelies and bendin’ the rim on that joint.

Let’s keep it real or all the way 100, whichever comes 1^st! They showed up with the MVP and 67 wins in the Memphis series gettin’ worked over by Marc Gasol and Z-Bo until some genius on Beal Street completely went away from the game plan. In Games 2 and 3 of that series Conley and Tony Allen held the Splash Brothers to 9 of 30 shootin’ from downtown and the bigs were killin’ ‘em in the blocks both in points and rebounds. Then all of a sudden Memphis thought they were Golden State and tried to run with them and started jackin’ up 3’s! Wheredeydodatat? And let it get away from them.

Houston showed up shell shocked after the dull Clippers freakin’ imploded with this cat rockin’ a beard that could score like the Fonz but was allergic to defense. They had no leader on the floor and a bunch of cats standin’ around and watchin’ the Runnin’ Beard play! Buster Brown was givin’ boyz solid double-doubles but he’s no leader with as much respect as a substitute teacher in the projects.

So on some real talk, Golden State really hasn’t been in a fight with some REAL cats this playoff season. Now they’re starin’ into the eyes of a bunch cats that nobody wanted. They’re in the lunch line with a bunch of free-lunch card holdin’ boyz that are willin’ to take everything they’ve got just to tell a boy they took it.

Steph and Co. are as soft as baby diarrhea and it’s finally showin’! You can’t finesse your way to the Ship playin’ against some rough ridin’ cats from Cleveland. Naw playa, you’re gonna have to put on some Timberlands and grind out here to get this.

Like I’ve been tellin’ you boyz all year long. A jump shootin’ team can’t win the NBA championship! Why? Because at some point you gotta put your back to the basket and bang with a boy. Did you real think when it came down to it that cats were just gonna let El DeBarge walk into their hood, shoot 3’s only and go to the crib?

Delly is givin’ that dun the blues bruh! In Game 3 he pushed, pulled and aggravated Steph for 45 minutes. All day Wednesday these media-type cats includin’ Stephen A. were talkin’ out of the sides of their mouths that Steph has finally found a rhythm because of the way he was shootin’ down the stretch of Game 3.

He was shootin’ like crazy because he was desperate. It’s easy to start gunnin’ when you’re down 17 points on the verge of a boy takin’ your old girl’s ride and your jewelry off of you. At that point he was just throwin’ garbage up and he was fallin’. That dun wasn’t even settin’ his feet or lookin’ at the rim. He was literally throwin’ up junk but the experts don’t wanna just say it. I know junk when a see it playa.

Guess what pimpin’? Tonight isn’t a continuation of Game 3! It’s Game 4 with freakin’ 48 hours in between them. Stop it! You sound crazy! Now he’s gotta find that junk all over again. Do you really think they’re gonna just let this boy get clean looks all night after they’ve figured out that Delly is an irritant that’s drivin’ him crazy? He’s frustrated and his body language shows it. Did you see him all night in Game 3 givin’ up on plays and pushin’ Delly off of him? Golden State as a team is as soft as drugstore cotton candy but they CAN shoot.

It’s gonna be mandatory that Cleveland win tonight because of the Warriors’ ability to get buckets quick and because of the Cavs lack of depth. With LeBron and Co. only playin’ like 6.25 people they can’t afford to go 7 games with a boy. They’ve got to keep hemmin’ these cats up in the restroom and takin’ their sneakers and lunch money. They’ve got to smell blood in the water tonight to have a chance at beatin’ these boyz. Not because GS has some fight left in them but because the Cavs would be gassed in the end. It would be a shame to lose the series because you ran out of gas because Golden State is the better TEAM but Cleveland is playin' harder.

Leadership and work ethic are kickin’ Golden State’s butt right now. And that’s the edited version. Who’s the leader in the Warriors locker room bruh? Exactly! Because it sure isn’t ole El DeBarge, I can tell you that! Steph had boyz fooled thinkin' that light skin and curly hair from the '80's was back. If it wasn't for Jordan all of the dark skinned cats would still be strugglin' out here. Light skin had all the women shook in the '80's bruh.

Let me put it where the goats can get it for all of my white brethren out there. In the 80's black women were trippin' all over themselves because of the R&B group called Switch and then a group came out shortly thereafter called DeBarge. They were all related and light skinned with curly hair. El was the lead singer and after they hit black women only wanted these light skinned, curly head cats. Then Jordan saved the brotherhood of dark skinned brothers because he took over the hoop game and pop culture. Now light skin is dead and dark skin with a bald heads are in forever! Amen brother! Preach! I'm am playa!

That threw me off for a second but gettin' back to leadership. A true leader doesn’t get kidnapped for 45 minutes by a dun that was an undrafted free agent that still works midnights on the loadin’ dock at Service Merchandise. Ole boy was completely disengaged when his shot wasn’t fallin’ and that’s not leadership or the MVP. So while you’re in town playa, go on over to LeBron’s crib and drop that trophy off and we’ll call it even. Stop me when I start lyin’!

Playas Thesaurus:

1) The Q: noun – Quicken Loans Arena, Cleveland, Ohio
2) Real Live Cats: noun – hood for vernacular for some really cool guys
3) Boyz: noun – anybody that I’m referring to. It’s non-gender specific
4) Whip: noun - car or vehicle
5) Dun: noun the person in question, dude, guy, girl, etc. Whoever I’m talkin’ about.
6) Fonz: noun – C’mon bruh it’s Arthur Herbert Fonzarelli from Happy Days. Ole boy had all the women.
7) Old girl: noun – your mother
Holla At Ya Boy!
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The caption under the photo isn’t real but its REAL talk!