Grown Man Business (How Iguodola paid the light, gas & rent & still played the numbers)

"What else you need me do to tonight playa?"

Horatio Nelson, the 18^th century British flag officer, once said, “Desperate affairs require desperate measures.” Mark Twain started trippin’ when he said this, “Under certain circumstances, urgent circumstances, desperate circumstances, profanity provides a relief denied even to prayer.” Then Heinz Guderian, a German general durin’ World War II, brought some sense back to the conversation when he spit, “There are no desperate situations, there are only desperate people.”

Well playas…the Golden State Warriors ran off into the “Q” on Thursday night as desperate as a crack head askin’ to borrow your momma’s car and her VCR. They came into the joint down 2-1 in the series completely understandin’ that no team in the history of the NBA Finals has ever gone down 3-1 and won a championship. So Steve Kerr became a mad scientist, changed the line-up, went small and went to work on the Cavs beatin’ them 103-82.

Let’s keep it real or all the way 100, whichever comes 1^st! Ole boy started Andrew Iguodola and it was like puttin’ prescription glasses on a cocked eyed cat in the club. They could instantly see everything and he clearly was the difference maker. Ig’s hit these boyz for 22 points and grabbed 8 rebounds while lockin’ down the King in the fourth quarter holdin’ a boy to nothin’ down the stretch. That’s what the old timers called Grown Man Business bruh!

With Kerr realizin’ that they were gettin’ mad handled for 3 games he made the ultimate adjustment and it saved the Warriors . They sacrificed the glass for speed and finally got into transition unlike they’ve been able to do for the first 3 joints. They got 11 fast break points to the Cavs 2. That may not seem like a lot to the naked eye but trust me playa that allowed them to finally play their game. Grown Man Business!

Kerr understood that if I can make these boyz run they’ll run out of gas! After all pimpin’, they’re human! You could see down the stretch that boyz were gassed and their legs were shot. No legs no shots! Literally! You already knew that Delly was gonna cave in at some point durin’ that game. He spent the freakin’ night in the hospital on IV’s after Game 3!! The Cavs have been brilliant for 3 games and slowin’ the pace and keepin’ Golden State from runnin’ has been the key. But not in Game 4 bruh!

For a normal human being 20 points, 12 rebounds and 8 assists sounds great for a boy but not for LeBron durin’ this series bruh! He was 20 points under his average and unfortunately, that dun’s got to put up 40 errr-night to give these cats a chance at winnin’.

And will somebody PLEASE tell me what team J.R. Smith is playin’ for? If that dun isn’t foulin’ boyz at the most inopportune times in Games 2 and 3 lookin’ like he’s point shavin’. As a matter of fact, check his wire transfers over the last 72 hours. Then in Game 4 he couldn’t hit water if he fell out of a boat in the middle of the Lake Erie. That dun was 2 for 12 from the field and 0 for 8 from downtown.

Golden State walked in from the word go and started takin’ lunch money and sneakers back. Both Steph and Ig’s dropped off 22 apiece, Draymond Green finally woke up from the dead and loaned a boy 17 points. Even ole dull Harrison Barnes came through Big Momma’s house with 14. When multiple cats are clickin’ and LeBron is 20 points under his series average it’s a problem playboy! Grown Man Business!

You know how when you were a shorty growin’ up in the hood and all the O.G.’s would tell the young cats hangin’ out at the corner store, “Hey young bloods y’all need to get outta here cuz it’s about to go down.” Some rival cats from another hood have just shown up and they don’t wanna have to explain to your moms that you got caught up in the foolishness. So they just made you leave. That was Golden State in Game 4 bruh! “Hey young bloods, y’all need to get outta here cuz it’s about to go down!” Grown Man Business!

Like I’ve been tellin’ you boyz, the Cavs needed to win Game 4 desperately because they don’t have the man power to go 7 games with these boyz. If they could have gone back to the Bay up 3-1 they would have been straight. Now it’s a problem and really some GROWN MAN BUSINESS! Now these boyz have to go back to Oak-town win 2 game out of 3 instead of havin’ to win 1 out of 3.

Unless J.R. Smith stops acceptin’ wire transfers in the middle of the night, Delly stops crampin’, Shumpert gets a 2015 haircut and LeBron can score 40+ points, grab 16 rebounds, throw 18 dimes and log 47 minutes for the next three ball games they’re in trouble! Call a spade a spade, kick a bear when he’s down and keep it real with a playa. These cats are in trouble right now bruh! What I keep sayin’? It’s Grown Man Business! Unfortunately, the Cavs don’t have enough grown men to play 7 games even if they win Game 6 back in Cleveland. Big props to Ig’s for payin’ the rent, the car note, the lights and gas and still havin’ enough to run the numbers over at Lil’ Ronnie BBQ joint.

But if LeBron can pull this off we need to start checkin’ his DNA bruh! Because he ain’t human! And that would be some REAL Grown Man Business! Stop me when I start lyin’!

Playas Thesaurus:
1) Grown Man Business: verb phrase – to be able to take care of business when everything is on the line.
2) Dun: noun – The person in question, dude, guy, girl, etc.
3) Pimpin’: noun – the person that I’m passionately tryin’ to get my point across to.
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The caption under the photo isn’t real but its REAL talk!