Magic City (How TCU, Baylor, FSU all put on swim suits but Ohio Stategot naked)

"I ain't new to this! I'm true to this playa!"

Matthew Arnold, the19th century English poet, once said, “Poetry is simply the most beautiful, impressive, and widely effective mode of saying things.” Judith Martin, the etiquette authority,  gave it to us like this, “It’s far more impressive when others discover your good qualities without your help.” Then Fuzzy Zoeller shut the joint down with, “Newspapers do a good job of telling me what happened yesterday, but they’d be a lot more impressive if they could tell me what’s going to happen tomorrow.”

As a matter of fact playboy, they’d impress me even more if they could tell me what’s gonna happen today at 12:30pm eastern! Everybody and their momma’s momma is waitin’ to see how this dull 12 person college football playoff committee is gonna wet the bed and get the bubble guts on a boy when they screw this playoff up.

Let’s keep it real or all the way 100, whichever comes 1^st! Because they’ve already shown tendencies of leakin’ on the mattress earlier this season by continuin’ to push the only undefeated team in America back to No.4 and jumpin’ TCU over Baylor when they’ve got the same record playin’ in the same conference and Baylor beat these boyz heads up.

Therefore, on Saturday all of the college football fans in this fine country were treated to free admission to the Miss College Football Playoff Beauty Pageant that turned into Magic City’s Finest! We’re only down to the final two contestants because we have two solid cats because the committee has liked them all season and they took care of business Friday night and Saturday afternoon. Oregon sang boyz a lullaby and put Arizona to sleep and Alabama just showed a little cleavage and Mizzou ran out of Atlanta scared to death.

So later on in the evenin’ we were down to the swim suit competition. Florida State came out in the usual one piece joint with the cape coverin’ up what boyz really wanted to see. You already know that she’s fine because she been fine for the past two years. She’s the chick that shows up and boyz say, “She bad bruh but I wanna see more! The crazy thing is, she knows she bad but she’s only gonna do enough to keep a boy lookin’!” Everybody’s been hollerin’ for 28 weeks and now 29 but nobody can crack the code. Undefeated is undefeated pimpin’!

Then TCU comes out in the two piece joint with all of the junk hangin’ out against ole dull Iowa State. We already knew that the Cyclones couldn’t handle the site of all of that bruh so they just passed out 55-3.

Baylor felt like they didn’t need to show much because they had already beaten TCU so they just walked down the runaway shook a little tail feather at the judges and sat down with a simple 38-27 win over Kansas State.

Then Ohio State came out knowin’ that these boyz are tryin’ to down grade them because Braxton Miller went down in camp and now J.T. Barrett is out of commission. So they completely acted a fool when they got on stage! These duns not only came out in my Bernie Mac voice, "Bucket Naked" but they had on the glitter and body wax! They were makin’ that joint wobble, shake, and dance all at the same time on Wisconsin. It got so bad that they were climbin’ the pole and divin’ into the audience and moonwalkin’ with the Ohio State band bruh!

By the time the Buckeyes finished in Indianapolis the judges were tryin’ to come up with new rules for the pageant just like these ole dull committee members have been doin’ all season long. Ohio State beat the brakes off of Wisconsin 59-0 and went to the crib.

So who’s in? Like these duns have been sayin’ all season! If they keep it real then Alabama, Oregon, Florida State and Ohio State should be in the ride when it pulls off bruh! You can’t deny Florida State because on some real talk they should be No.1 because they’re the only duns undefeated. Can’t argue with Bama and Oregon. Ohio State showed up and clowned in the Big Ten Championship Game and completely shut down the best runnin’ attack known to man in Melvin Gordon! Also they aren’t brand new to this bruh because they didn’t lose a single conference game at all. Stop it bruh!  It ain’t even close.

TCU has no argument because they lost to Baylor heads up and Baylor lost to unranked West Virginia in conference and their non-conference schedule was boo-boo. They played SMU, Northwestern State and freakin’ Buffalo! And they didn’t even try to look good in the swim suit competition. So the top four at 12:30pm eastern should be, 1)Florida State 2) Alabama 3) Oregon 4) Ohio State! However, the rankings won't be in that order. Florida State is gettin' screwed because they should be the top seed but they won't be. Stop me when I start lyin’ and make sure you check out my (Video) HILARIOUS College Football Weekly Wrap Up: Week 15!

Holla At Ya Boy!
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The caption under the photo isn’t real but its REAL talk!