The Crooked Letter (The REAL reason boyz ain't safe in these college football streets)

"The chess board just moved playa!"

Boyz were standin’ out in front of the liquor store arguin’ about chaos late Saturday night. So Buddha pulled up with a bunch of homies in the ride and said, “Chaos is inherent in all compounded things. Strive on with diligence.” Napoleon Bonaparte jumped out of the car seat and shouted, “The battlefield is a scene of constant chaos. The winner will be the one who controls that chaos, both his own and the enemies.” Then Sid Vicious, the most famous member of the punk group the Sex Pistols, took a squig of the Malt Liquor and passed it when he said, “Undermine their pompous authority, reject their moral standards, make anarchy and disorder your trademarks. Cause as much chaos and disruption as possible but don’t let them take you ALIVE.”

Well playboy…the college football weekend definitely undermined pompous authority, rejected moral standards and made anarchy and disorder of boyz trademarks. If you don’t believe me holler at the then No.2 Parliament Funkadelic on Thursday night, then roll on down to the Crooked Letter and ride through the Grove on Saturday evenin’ and holler at No. 3 Alabama gettin’ out of the showers. Oh I’m still trippin’ bruh? Stay in the Crooked Letter and go holler at No.6 Texas A&M that were rockin’ the sweet all white joints in Starkville when they got the breaks beat off of them by Dak Prescott and Co. I bet they won’t wear those joints every again and they were hotttt!

If that wasn’t crazy enough for you, go let the duns from No.4 Oklahoma speak on it on the dull bus ride back to Norman from Ft. Worth after Trevone Boykin and his homeboys from TCU put that thang on them.

Well let’s keep it real or all the way 100, whichever comes 1^st! What I’m sayin’ pimpin’ is that nobody’s safe out here in these streets. Just because your trademark is hot and established doesn’t mean that boy won’t run up on you while you’re hollerin’ at the broads in the club and shank you. Neither of the duns from the Crooked Letter cared about tradition and street cred on Saturday. They rolled up on these boyz and took what they had in the trunk and kept in movin’.

Now these ole dull 13 cats on this committee better be payin’ attention to what’s goin’ on out here because if they’re relyin’ on somebody to tell them what’s happenin’ they’re in trouble. Or if they’re waitin’ on it to shake out with four undefeated teams they’re in trouble because that ain’t gonna happen playa.

"You ain't lyin' playa!"

The SEC, Big 12 and PAC-12 are all gonna cannibalize themselves because they’ve all got road courses to run that are unavoidable. Both Ole Miss and Miss State are sittin’ on the same side of the fence so somebody’s gotta die in the chaos. You already know that the other isn’t goin’ to run the table because they’re from the Crooked Letter bruh. They don’t have enough players to survive the gauntlet of attrition by seasons end. There is a huge drop off in talent from the first team cat to the second or third team cat. You can’t keep everybody healthy all season long. So you know they’re gonna fall at some point.

The PAC-12, which is probably the second best conference as a whole right now, is eatin’ its traditional powers right for lunch at this point. Ole dull Rich Rod and his Arizona Wildcats are the only duns still undefeated and who in their right minds thinks that they’ll run the table out there?

The Big 12 is always nuts because everybody plays everybody. As a matter of fact, TCU hosts Baylor next week! So the only two duns left undefeated have to get it in right now. So guess what pimpin’? The Horn Frogs can’t celebrate the OU win for too long because they’ve got business to take care of in less than 7 days. And you already know that the Sooners will get back into the hunt because they’ve got the ability to sneak up on a boy and snake bite him.

For all of you Notre Dame Fans that think that you’re beyond reproach right now, look at the schedule playa. You still gotta go down to Tallahassee, out to Arizona State and Los Angeles to holler at USC. Those won’t be field trips and you forgot all about ole dull motorcycle ridin’ Bobby Pebtrino and his Louisville Cardinals are comin’ to town in November.

So what am I sayin’ homie? It ain’t gonna be easy to get to the finish line unscathed this year. So I hope the Dull-13 are watchin’ the ball drop like boyz in Time Square because it’s gonna be fun to see it all go down. This is why I love college football because all of the pieces on the chess board are constantly movin’! You just can’t watch your team playboy. You’ve gotta watch the entire board! Let the chaos resume just give me a cold Diet Coke, some lemon pepper wings and get out of my way! Stop me when I start lyin’!

Holla At Ya Boy!
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The caption under the photo isn’t real but its REAL talk!