Checked Out (Why the ND Leprechaun and Bevo ended up behind the stadium shootin' dice)

"Get off me dawg! I got this maaaaaan!"
Wole Soyinka, the Nigerian playwright and poet, once said, “Power is domination, control and therefore a very selective form of truth which is a lie.” Mikhail Gorbachev, of all people, broke it down like this, “The world will not accept dictatorship or domination.” Then Robert Louis Stevenson, the Scottish novelist and poet, shut the buildin’ down when he smoothly spit, “The habit of being happy enables one to be freed, or largely freed, from the domination of outward conditions.”

Well playas…the Texas Longhorns must have been miserable when they showed up in South Bend on Saturday because Notre Dame completely dominated them in every aspect of the game blastin’ them 38-3. If being happy enables a boy to be freed or largely freed from the domination of outward conditions Texas better start travelin’ with Eddie Murphy, Richard Pryor, Kat Williams and Kevin Hart bruh! Or stop goin’ up to Notre Dame!

Let’s keep it real or all the way 100, whichever comes 1st! Notre Dame was on a mission to prove to the college football world that they were the real deal at least in Week 1 anyway and that they deserved their No.11 ranking. Now let’s slow our roll because we’ve yet to see just how good or bad Texas really is but its Texas bruh and that’s good enough for the freakin’ Leprechaun.

A dun with the funkiest name in college football, Malik Zaire, started at quarterback for the Irish and in my Big Momma voice, “Showed out!” Malik Zaire sounds like a rock star and he played like one on Saturday. Ole boy finished the night goin’ 19-22 for 313 yards, 3 TD’s and no turnovers. His 86.4 completion rate was the second-best in school history behind only Steve Beurlein, who went 10 of 11 against Colorado in 1984!

Do you realize how many studs have gone through ND over the years? And this cat looked that good in only his second career start!! And trust me playa, it doesn’t matter whether they played Texas or the Indiana School of the freakin’ Blind! He showed out and Big Momma enjoyed every minute of it.

"Man take these horns off of me bruh! Wastin' my time!"
Now don’t forget about the dun he was slingin’ the rock to all night because most media-types around the country keep tryin’ to. Will Fuller is a MONSTER comin’ off of a 15 touchdown season a year ago. He showed up to work and swooped 7 boyz for 142 yards and two touchdowns just to let you know that he was in the ride.

Texas had better figure out who and what they’re gonna become because the good ole boyz down in the Lone Star State aren’t gonna be as nice to Charlie Strong as Notre Dame was to him on Saturday. Even though ND beat the brakes off of him they still called him sir after it was over. I’m just sayin’!

It got so bad at one point that Bevo took off his horns and huffs and put on a wave cap and some house shoes. By the start of the 4th quarter he was smokin’ cigarettes and shootin’ dice with the Leprechaun behind the stadium. They were completely checked out bruh! And the Leprechaun was tired of doin' push-ups and dancin' for boyz.

With Malik Zaire at the helm for the Fightin’ Irish it should be a great season to watch because ND with Everette Golson was a turnover machine. Put ya seat belts on and enjoy the ride playas! Stop me when I start lyin’!

Playas Thesaurus:
1) Spit: verb – to say
2) Dun: noun – the person in question, dude, guy, etc. It’s whoever I’m talkin’ about and its non-gender specific.
3) Swooped: verb – to catch

Holla At Ya Boy!
JayGravesReport
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The caption under the photo isn’t real but its REAL talk! 
 
 

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