Lil' Smell Good (How the Cowboys' Joseph Randle got jammed up by the freakin' mall cop)

"You know what dawg? I feel like stealin' somethin'!"

Sun Tzu, the ancient Chinese military strategist and philosopher, once said, “Pretend inferiority and encourage his arrogance.” John C. Maxwell, the famous author and speaker, gave boyz something to chew on with, “There are two kinds of pride, both good and bad. ‘Good pride’ represents our dignity and self-respect. ‘Bad pride’ is the deadly sin of superiority that reeks of conceit and arrogance.” Then William Pollard, the famous writer and Quaker, shook the joint up with, “Learning and innovation go hand in hand. The arrogance of success is to think that what you did yesterday will be sufficient for tomorrow.”

Well I guess that same arrogance of success took over in ole dull reserve Dallas Cowboys’ running back Joseph Randle on Monday night. This dun walked into a Dallas area shoppin’ mall and helped himself to a $39 pack of Polo underwear and a tester bottle of Gucci Guilty Black cologne valued at $84. Get this bruh, after he’d already paid for something at the perfume counter.

Let’s keep it real or all the way 100, whichever comes 1^st! He was so full of pride and arrogance after he and his boyz went up to Seattle on Sunday and beat the Super Bowl champs at the crib that he figured he was untouchable. Am I lyin’? Accordin’ to the police at the scene, after bein’ placed in the back of the police car, ole boy told them that he would have kept on walkin’ when he was confronted by the “mall cop” had he known that he would have been arrested. Why? Because the arrogance of success made him think that what he did on Sunday would be sufficient enough for Monday's foolishness.

This dun figured that the Ole Otis was gonna be a groupie and ask for an autograph or just let a boy slide because he played for the Cowboys. Not just the Cowboys but the 5-1 Cowboys that had just beaten the Seahawks bruh. Those Cowboys! It’s not like the dun couldn’t afford to pay for the stuff. And that’s the edited version. He makes $495,000! For all of you simple minded individuals that’s just shy of a half of a million dollars playboy.

He stole that stuff because he figured that he could because he played for the freakin’ Cowboys. How ignorant is that? Now he’s gotta go home and tell somebody; his wife, baby momma, jump off, the duns from the hood that are taggin’ along or all of the above that he got fired for stealin’ some draws and some smell good that he could have gotten in the barber shop for $20. Or he could have hollered at me because I keep several bottles of Gucci Guilty on deck pimpin'! TheJayGravesReport is strictly for the playas play!

And for all of you wanna be educated duns that wanna correct me for callin’ them draws instead of drawers. I’m from the hood and we call them draws around my way playboy. However, I know that it’s drawers which is a British word created in the early/mid 20^th century for women’s knickers which probably comes from drawin’ up the underwear as in drawin’ up curtains. So don’t play with me playa I’m well educated and well read. I'm just more comfortable gettin' down like this.

So oh yeah bruh, he’s gonna get fired because the NFL is takin’ a hit right now and if you’re not a super star that $125 theft may as well have been $125,000 in jewels playa. And even if you are a super star you better be on your P’s and Q’s because these boyz ain't playin' out here. Goodell is already lookin' like a clown so you better watch out.

Just think about the conversation that he’s gotta have with Big Momma this evenin’! She’s goin’ up one side of him and down the other! She might revert back to some old school joints and make him go outside and get a switch. I’m just sayin’! Stop me when I start lyin’!

Holla At Ya Boy!
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