Dodgeball (How the Colts enrolled in the Roy Hibbert Car Sittin'Academy in Pittsburgh)

"C'mon bruh! You know the drill!"

Brene Brown, the famous author, once said, “Vulnerability is about showing up and being seen. It’s tough to do that when we’re terrified about what people might see or think.” Woody Allen gave it to us like this, “Eighty percent of success is showing up.” Then Paul Schneider, the famous actor, hit boyz in the head with, “I feel strongly about showing up and being prepared and not taking the opportunity for granted and being conscientious about my fellow co-workers.”

Well bruh…the only cats that felt strongly about showin’ up prepared and not takin’ the opportunity for granted were the freakin’ Pittsburgh Steelers on Sunday. They walked into the joint and beat the doors, brakes, transmission, seats and trunk off of the Indianapolis Colts 51-34. And that’s the edited version! 

What made it even worse was that they beat the snot out of ‘em wearin’ clown suits bruh! Can you imagine a boy runnin' up on you at the light in a Bozo the Clown costume and beatin' you down? Now who are you gonna tell that story to? You can't tell the fellas right? So imagine how these cats feel this morning when everybody and Big Monma's hairstylist saw them get carjack by Homie the Clown on TV.

Let’s keep it real or all the way 100, whichever comes 1^st! The Colts showed up in Pittsburgh ridin’ a five game winnin’ streak feelin’ good about themselves or like Big Momma used to say, “Smellin’ themselves” and got ran over in the middle of the street. Big Ben jumped out of the bushes on these boyz and set a Steelers passin’ record by puttin’ up 522 yards and six touchdowns.

The Colts pulled a Roy Hibbert on us and refused to get out of the freakin’ car bruh! Now let me take that back because Andrew Luck, T.Y. Hilton and Donte Moncrief did jump out of the ride and fight for their sneakers and jewelry. However, the offensive line and the entire defense sat in the ride scared to death eatin’ Skittles, cornbread and Funions with ole dull Roy Hibbert.

Andrew Luck was out there runnin’ for his life all day. It’s amazin’ that he even managed to put up 400 yards passin’ and throw 3 touchdowns because he was hurried on every play. T.Y. gave boyz the business with 6 catches for 155 yards and a touchdown as well as Moncrief with 7 joints for 113 yards and a score.

However, everybody else enrolled in the Roy Hibbert Car Sittin' Academy for Back Seat Drivers and the Luther Vandross listenin’ parties. Yesterday was Day 1 of the learnin’ how to hang your feet out of the back seat properly. Did you see the defensive secondary bruh? Big Ben was completin’ passes without a boy even bein’ in the picture frame. The Steelers’ receivers were open more than a crack house in the ghetto or a meth lab in a trailer park playboy. The DB’s must have gotten to the Academy early and they were on Day 2 of “How to get so comfortable in the ride that you simply fall asleep on a boy in the middle of the fight.”

Like I’ve been sayin’ for 4 or 5 weeks now, turnovers are a problem and the Colts gave it up twice again on Sunday. However, those two joints were the least of their worries. It got so bad for a boy that ole Andrew turned into White Goodman in Dodgeball because he was throwin’ that joint to boyz legs and feet just to keep from gettin’ sacked. All he needed was that dull mustache and bandana bruh. DULL!!!

The Steelers put up 639 yards of total offense on these boyz and scored 28 points in the second quarter alone. It was bad bruh and I know boyz are glad to just get out of Pittsburgh breathin’. Up next, the New York Giants and hopefully they can rebound against them. I just hope boyz didn’t get too comfortable ridin’ around with Roy and lose all of their dignity. Stop me when I start lyin’!

Holla At Ya Boy!
JayGravesReport
#thebestdressedmaninmedia
Get @ me on Twitter: @jaygravesreportFacebook: www.facebook.com/TheJayGravesReport

Instagram: JayGravesReport
The caption under the photo isn’t real but its REAL Talk!