"It's on an poppin' now bruh!" |
1. You can only fill out one bracket! I hate when people show up to work with 10 joints filled out and try to win the office pool. "If it's shady and you now it clap ya hands." Clap! Clap! When the tournament is over this person gallivants around like they really knew something about college basketball. Sorry excuse for a sports fan!!!
2. Don't fill out your kid's bracket! If he or she can't talk or walk they can't participate. If they're still grunting and stinking then they can't have a freaking bracket! That's final. I get tired of losing to some kid that's 8 months old with snot hanging out of their nose.
3. Don't pick the stupid teams based on the uniforms! If you haven't watched the games to this point just say that you don't know and bow out gracefully.
4. Don't try to change your bracket once all of your Final Four teams lose! I get tired of duns that pick boyz to make it to the Final Four and then by next Friday they've got somebody else on their bracket because all of they're joints are sitting at the crib.
5. Don't show up to the sports bar on Thursday talking trash or wearing your team logo if your school isn't in the tournament. You're on punishment for crying out loud!! If your school sucks then you have to stay at the crib! Also no brew and wings for you or your boyz and that's final!
6. Don't install that stupid software with the fake graphs on it to try to fool your boss when he walks past your computer. He knows that you're watching the games because he's watching the freaking games in his office. Just keep it real, order pizza and go to the conference room and watch it together. Now that's a G move right there bruh!
7. Don't get on Facebook or Twitter lying about being at the games. Who cares? It's better to watch it at the crib or at the sports bar you idiot! There's always some clown trying to big time like nobody else can just walk up and buy a ticket to a half sold arena because half the teams had to fly across the country to play in the tournament and their fans only had 48 hours to book a flight. Wheredeydodatat? Or on some real talk, who can afford to do that? Facebook a boy when you've got court side seats in Atlanta for the Final Four if you wanna impress me pimpin'!
8. If you win the bracket challenge and get the traveling trophy don't try to keep the stupid thing or try to pawn it down at Big Momma's Pawn & Chicken Shack! You can't do anything with a trophy in the streets but get beat up or drink out of it and Ned the Whinno just drinks straight out of the bottle! That's why they call it a traveling trophy playboy! It's travels!!! Return it next year and I mean it!!
9. Don't call in sick Thursday and Friday because you'll look like a complete fool! Trust me. Those duns are still unemployed from getting fired last year for sitting in the the sports bar gettin' it in simply because they didn't invite their bosses to join them. Just be honest bruh because he would have rolled with you and you'd still have a job! Use a vacation day and you won't have to hide out all day! Trust me!
10. Finally, don't spend the next 24 hours asking folks "who's your Final Foul teams" so you can pick yours. This is an independent project tonight. No cheating!
You've officially been warned by the ghetto bracket police! You know how we get it in so let's get it in!
Holla At Ya Boy!
Jay Graves
Follow me on Twitter: @jaygravesreport
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