Lame Dunk

Terrence Ross finally gets a dunk off to win this lame joint! 

The term Slam Dunk was coined by famed Los Angeles Lakers announcer Chick Hearn. Prior to that it was known as the dunk shot. From 1967 to 1976 it was banned from use by the NCAA because of the dominance of the big homie Lew Alcindor later known as Kareem Abdul-Jabbar. You would think that NBA banned that joint last night as we watched probably the worse Slam Dunk Contest in history. I thought the joints the past two years were terrible but that joint was ridiculous bruh!

Just the thought of the Slam Dunk Contest used to excite boyz around the world. It was nothing for the best dunkers in the league to step up and compete. Remember how Jordan, Dominique and Clyde would have you standing up on the couch going crazy?

Remember when 5’7” Spud Webb rocked the house and people talked about it for the rest of the year? Vince Carter hung on the rim and boyz went nuts! There are countless players and dunks that come to mind that have made this event so special. It was THE event that made All-Star Saturday night worth watching or going to. On some real talk, it WAS All-Star Weekend bruh!

Now we've been reduced to watching the Riverside Recreational Youth Camp Dunk-A-Thon! It was like they just pulled some cats off of the streets in the 3rd Ward or went up in the Galleria and asked who wanted to get in the dunk contest. When duns were out there running up and down the court trying to just get off a dunk it went from bad to worse pimpin’! I couldn't figure out if cats were running suicides or trying to dunk? It was so bad I'm not gonna even mention these dudes names!

Straight up bruh, the NBA owes me money for even watching that joint. I’m just glad that I didn’t get on a flight and spend some real bread to go to Houston because I would've been like ole boy Mayhem from the Allstate commercial and tore that joint up for that.  I got a call from Sprite late last night saying that they're going to give me a lifetime supply for my troubles. I told them while you're at it throw in All-Star Game tickets for life and we've got a deal. They wrestled with me on that for a while but we finally got the deal done in the wee hours of the morning.

I sound like my pops when I say this but these young boys are made of something different. Nobody wants to compete these days on GP. It’s strictly about the money! How can you be the best dunkers on the planet and not be in the dunk contest? Why wasn't Blake Griffin and LeBron not the only two duns in the contest? Straight up!

 It was nothing for cats back in the day to win that joint and start preparing for the following year’s contest. You were the king until somebody knocked you off bruh! Yeah, I know ole boy Jeremy Evans won it last year but it was wack too. So I'm at least going back to Blake because he can legitimately dunk. Even though jumping over the Kia was wack because he jumped over the hood instead of the top of it.

You remember how boyz used to race down the street in the hood and Mrs. Johnson’s car was the finish line? “Hold up, let me take my socks off because I’m faster with them joints off.”  You didn’t stop racing until you got beat. Now boyz won’t even get in the race!

How crazy would it have sounded for Jordan to be in his prime and not be in the Slam Dunk Contest? The NBA should be ashamed of itself for that. I say if none of the marquee dunkers aren't gonna to be in it, then don't have it!

Find something else to do like teach these clowns how to dress! From D. Wade to CP3 to Russell Westbrook to LeBron and beyond! These cats should be beaten up for puttin' on the gear they’re rockin’ in the NBA bruh!  Now I’m all over Jordan for being a jerk and being selfish etc but nobody wore a suit better than MJ playa!

Boyz back in the day from the 1970’s with Walt Frazier to the ‘80’s and ‘90’s with Air Jordan got it in! They looked like superstars coming into the building or jumping out of the ride. Now these young cats look like the revenge of the nerds and now every kid in America looks like it too! My son says it’s called being different. I told him that if boyz wore that mess to school in my day they wouldn’t make it home in it!

On some real talk, you couldn't get a woman with that goofy stuff these cats are wearing now. So the real question is, what's up with today's women? Well, I guess nothing because as long as boyz money is still long and green they'll still look just as good! Stop me when I start lyin’!


Holla At Ya Boy!
Jay Graves
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