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| "My kids names bruh? Uhhhhh lemme see!" |
Marcus Tullius Cicero, the ancient Roman philosopher, once said, “The wise are instructed by reason, average minds by experience, the stupid by necessity and the brute by instinct.” John Wayne pulled up with a bunch of the homies from the projects and said, “Life is tough, but it’s tougher if you’re stupid.” Then Benjamin Franklin made it rain in the club showin' boyz his picture when he spit, “We are all born ignorant, but one must work hard to remain stupid.”
Well playas…not only is Antonio Cromartie workin’ hard to remain stupid, he’s puttin’ in overtime, stealin’ boy’z shifts and doctorin’ timecards in the process. Some kind of way the producers of ESPN’s First Take invited that dun onto the show Thursday durin’ Jets trainin’ camp and asked him about the Tom Brady suspension and this was his response bruh.
“Honestly, I don’t think he should be suspended. The Patriots got fined. They got took away draft picks.” Hold it!!!! Did that dun just say on NATIONAL TELEVISION “They got took away?” Big Momma just threw up all over the carpet and dropped her blunt bruh. Whoever the producer of that show is needs to be fired but before they run him out of the buildin’ beat the brakes off of him with a toothbrush and a shoe. I'm talkin' about a broad that used to be a dude's shoe. I size 16 pump!
Let’s keep it real or all the way, 100 whichever comes 1st! Why are we talkin’ to Antonio Cromartie about ANYTHING playa? Excuse my grammar but ain’t this the same dun that has 12 kids by 9 different women? He’s got 4 with his wife and 8 more by 7 different chicks bruh! Not only is he probably the most reckless cat in the NFL but he can’t even name all of his seeds.
On an episode of Hard Knocks back in 2010 they asked that dun to name all of his kids and he couldn’t and he only had 10 at the time. ONLY!? So how do we get to the point of askin’ Antonio Cromartie anything? Ain’t this the same cat that borrowed 500 stacks from the Jets in 2011 as soon as he signed with them durin’ the Lock Out because he was behind on child support?
Think about it bruh, you make an offer to a boy for the position that you’ve got open and the dun accepts then pulls you to the side and wants an advance on his bread so he can pay his child support. Sound effect: "SpongeBob eye blink." What are you gonna do with that fool at that moment bruh? Walk his butt right out of the door.
Talkin’ to this cat is like talkin’ to Rollo the dope fiend or Ned the Whino after the car accident. You know how the news crew always seems to find the dumbest cat on the block to interview when something pops off in the hood. He’s out there lookin’ crazy with his hair all over his head even with the Pantyhose on, he’s got on mix matched shoes, his momma’s shirt and stinkin’ like death but the reporter is interested in his perspective.
Out of all the Joe’s at Jets trainin’ camp they pulled this fool out of the line up to talk to. You already know that he’s not playin’ with a full deck!!! He shows up for the interview with a King, a Club, the Ace of Spade and 3 Uno cards complainin’ about Roger Goodell’s power to discipline boyz in the league. Stop complainin’ about Goodell’s power when the darn NFLPA voted to give him that very power. Stop it! You sound crazy!!! And that’s the edited version.
Naw bruh…what I wanna know is who was the dun that decided that Cromartie was the individual that they NEEDED to talk to on live TV? Bring me that fool in a Full Nelson butt naked with nipple clamps on him so I can whoop and torture his butt. He shouldn’t ever work again. Stop me when I start lyin’!
Playas Thesaurus:
Well playas…not only is Antonio Cromartie workin’ hard to remain stupid, he’s puttin’ in overtime, stealin’ boy’z shifts and doctorin’ timecards in the process. Some kind of way the producers of ESPN’s First Take invited that dun onto the show Thursday durin’ Jets trainin’ camp and asked him about the Tom Brady suspension and this was his response bruh.
“Honestly, I don’t think he should be suspended. The Patriots got fined. They got took away draft picks.” Hold it!!!! Did that dun just say on NATIONAL TELEVISION “They got took away?” Big Momma just threw up all over the carpet and dropped her blunt bruh. Whoever the producer of that show is needs to be fired but before they run him out of the buildin’ beat the brakes off of him with a toothbrush and a shoe. I'm talkin' about a broad that used to be a dude's shoe. I size 16 pump!
Let’s keep it real or all the way, 100 whichever comes 1st! Why are we talkin’ to Antonio Cromartie about ANYTHING playa? Excuse my grammar but ain’t this the same dun that has 12 kids by 9 different women? He’s got 4 with his wife and 8 more by 7 different chicks bruh! Not only is he probably the most reckless cat in the NFL but he can’t even name all of his seeds.
On an episode of Hard Knocks back in 2010 they asked that dun to name all of his kids and he couldn’t and he only had 10 at the time. ONLY!? So how do we get to the point of askin’ Antonio Cromartie anything? Ain’t this the same cat that borrowed 500 stacks from the Jets in 2011 as soon as he signed with them durin’ the Lock Out because he was behind on child support?
Think about it bruh, you make an offer to a boy for the position that you’ve got open and the dun accepts then pulls you to the side and wants an advance on his bread so he can pay his child support. Sound effect: "SpongeBob eye blink." What are you gonna do with that fool at that moment bruh? Walk his butt right out of the door.
Talkin’ to this cat is like talkin’ to Rollo the dope fiend or Ned the Whino after the car accident. You know how the news crew always seems to find the dumbest cat on the block to interview when something pops off in the hood. He’s out there lookin’ crazy with his hair all over his head even with the Pantyhose on, he’s got on mix matched shoes, his momma’s shirt and stinkin’ like death but the reporter is interested in his perspective.
Out of all the Joe’s at Jets trainin’ camp they pulled this fool out of the line up to talk to. You already know that he’s not playin’ with a full deck!!! He shows up for the interview with a King, a Club, the Ace of Spade and 3 Uno cards complainin’ about Roger Goodell’s power to discipline boyz in the league. Stop complainin’ about Goodell’s power when the darn NFLPA voted to give him that very power. Stop it! You sound crazy!!! And that’s the edited version.
Naw bruh…what I wanna know is who was the dun that decided that Cromartie was the individual that they NEEDED to talk to on live TV? Bring me that fool in a Full Nelson butt naked with nipple clamps on him so I can whoop and torture his butt. He shouldn’t ever work again. Stop me when I start lyin’!
Playas Thesaurus:
1) Dun: noun – the person in question, dude, guy, etc. It’s whoever I’m talkin’ about and it’s non- gender specific too.
2) Seed: noun – your child or children
2) Seed: noun – your child or children
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JayGravesReport
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The caption under the photo isn’t real but its REAL talk!
JayGravesReport
#thebestdressedmaninmedia
Get @ me on Twitter: @jaygravesreport
Facebook: www.facebook.com/TheJayGravesReport
Instagram: JayGravesReport
The caption under the photo isn’t real but its REAL talk!
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