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| When you put a boyz jersey on you may as well be doin' this! |
Well playas...most of these cats don't care that they're an embarrassment when they step out of the crib with another man's work shirt on. Yes, I'm talkin' about grown men rockin' another grown man's and in many cases some young kid's jersey that isn't their kid, nephew or family member either to a game or just plain walkin' around bruh. Let's keep it real or all the way 100, whichever comes 1st! Ninety percent of reality is perception. There's no sense in arguin' with that statement. It is what it is playboy! Since the NBA Conference Finals kick off tonight, let me holla at all of my duns that refuse to listen to reason that continue to put on another grown man's jersey and go out in public! Bruh, under no circumstances is that permissible! Let's put that on the table right now. I know that some of you grew up seein' other men wearin' them but they didn't know any better. It's like the blind leadin' the blind at this point.
Grown men need to look like grown men even at the game playa. Let me be specific so there's no confusion as to who I'm talkin' about. I’m hollerin' at two sets of individuals. The cats that are at least thirty years old and those that have children that are at least ten years old. I need to be specific because boyz will be standin' around screamin', "He ain't talkin to me fam! Naw bruh, he got me twisted!" Duns less than thirty without kids are still tryin' to figure out who and what they wanna be so I'll give them a pass. Let's be honest that's a very small club anyway. So we'll let them be for the time bein'.
A man that is at least thirty is what the ole timers call “A Fully Grown Man”. Regardless of whether he has children or not, it isn’t permissible for him to walk around lookin' like a child dressed up in a grown man's costume. All of you simple minded individuals will catch that one later. A man with children that are at least ten years old shouldn’t leave the house dressed like his kids regardless of his age. While we’re at it let’s throw in the flat bib baseball caps and the saggin' pants too. What REAL cats call, "The Infamous Clown Suit."
Now I’m not sayin' that a grown man can’t represent his favorite team durin' the Conference Finals and beyond. That’s why they make team apparel like dry fit polo’s, T-shirts, joggin' suits etc. It’s definitely OK to put your Cavs, Hawks, Warriors or Rockets team logo baseball cap on. Just not the flat bib joint bruh, not if you've got kids that are wearin' those joints too. Here’s why this is so important to understand. Once you become a grown man, you have to assume the look of a grown man. You can't leave the crib lookin' like you're on your way to high school bruh. You can't show up lookin' like you go to the "Velt" (my alma mater) and you've got a grown woman for a wife and some kids.
You look like a darn fool! And that's the edited version. I’m speakin specifically about the hats, jerseys and matchin' sneakers. My son rocks that type of gear because he's 18! If I walk around lookin' like him, people won’t take me seriously. I'm his father, so therefore, I’ve got to look like his father. I can’t afford to look like one of his boys and we're hangin' out in the same places. If you and your son leave the crib rockin' the same gear ya'll look like you're about to holla at the same chicks! Do you hear me bruh? The VERY same chicks!!
I think back to how embarrassin' would it have been when I was growin' up if my dad were rockin' the same gear that my friends and I were wearin'. What if I were in the basement with my boyz back in '83 bumpin' some of that ole Grandmaster Flash "The Message" or better yet some of that Run DMC "It's Like That" and we were rockin' the shell toe Adidas, Kangols and dookie ropes, like we did EVERYDAY, and my ole man came down the stairs with those joints on too? How crazy would he look and how dumb would I feel?
I hear my old head jersey wearin' cats screamin' from the rooftops, “Well I don’t have kids so I’m good bruh”. Let me put it where the goats can get it. If you’re freakin' LeBron's age with his jersey on. You look like a groupie even if you‘re at the game pimpin'. Think about this…because you're his age, you could potentially show up in the same spots that he hangs out at, like restaurants, night clubs, etc. Let's say you're standin' at the bar orderin' a drink and he walks up to order one too. How stupid do you look? Even though he's makin' money off of yo dumb "A" he's shakin' his head like "Look at this fool." See it's somewhat OK for a professional athlete to wear one of his boy's jerseys because they're on the same level. I still have a problem with it though, but it's cool. See LeBron can put on Adrian Peterson's joint because he's not wishin' he was AD. or Jay-Z can put on LeBron's joint because he's freakin' Jay-Z. He's more accomplished than LeBron in his profession and they're boyz!!!
I’ve got several friends that have played professional sports includin' basketball, football and baseball. They’re all retired now but it wasn’t uncommon for them to think that duns that wore jerseys looked stupid. You can’t be a grown man wearin' another man's name of your back. I equate the guy that puts on another man's jersey to a woman that puts on her man's shirt after sex and walks around the house smellin' it. That's how stupid you look to boyz out here bruh.
As much as I liked Eric Dickerson when I was in high school. There is NO WAY I would have put on his jersey, even when I was eighteen years old for ALL of those same reasons. Maybe because I was an athlete and it just seemed silly to me to rock another cats joint.
And please don't give me the "Man I only wear Hall of Famers jesrseys!" Well 9 out of 10 if the dun is a Hall of Famer then you're old enough to know who he is or was, then you're at least 35 or 40 or much older. So you look even "stupid-er" than the duns that I'm hollerin' at that are 30! "Naw bruh, I only wear dead Hall of Famers like Walter Payton!" You still look like a fool! If you've got a Walter frame that joint and put it up in the 'Man Cave' at the crib. You don't wear it because you look like a old fool in it. Especially if your stomach is stretchin' that joint out of shape. C'mon bruh!
You know what? I really blame these women out here for this foolishness. Because if they had some standards like they had 20 plus years ago we wouldn't see these fools out here lookin' crazy. When I was a Young Thunder Cat you couldn't step to some woman with your pants fallin' off of you, your hair not combed wearin' another man's work shirt. Are you kiddin' me?
Again, what kind of grown woman wants to show up somewhere with a child dressed up like a grown man? If your hangin' out with women that don’t mind you wearin' jerseys. Then they’re probably dressed up like their teenaged daughters and you've got to stop her by the mall to pick up the new Jordan's on your way to dinner. Stop men when I start lyin'!
Playas Thesaursus:
1) Dun: noun - the person in question, dude, guy, girl, etc. It's a word to describe anybody you're talkin' about bruh. And it's nongender specific.
2) Fam: noun - short for family, it shows a kinship to a boy. We're close so I can say to a boy what I wouldn't normally say to a stranger.
3) Let me put it where the goats can get it.: to break it all the way down for you. To make it as simple as possible in other words to spoon feed you bruh. Goats eat off of the ground for all of you simple minded individuals that just can't pick up on 3rd grade context clues.
4) Young Thunder Cat: noun - when a boy is young and out of control. The age range is about 22 to 32. You just got out of school and startin' to work, you think you've got some bread but you don't. However, a boy can't tell you anything because these women think that you've got more than you really do. So you're frontin' makin' $2 look like $100.
Holla At Ya Boy!
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