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| "Hey man this dun keeps fartin'!" |
In other words playboy, when the dun gettin’ whooped just lies down and takes it. The Miami Heat got the breaks beat off of them again by the San Antonio Spurs on South Beach in front of Big Momma nem 107-86 without even puttin’ up a fight bruh. It was like takin’ a boy’z sneakers off of him at midnight in a dark alley at gun point. Too easy!
After gettin’ their door kicked in in Game 3 by the Feds/Spurs shootin’ a 76 percent first half on Tuesday night the Heat still looked shook from the experience. Even though they talked a good game and jumped in the ride to go get what boyz beat out of them a few days ago they still ended up in trouble again.
As that Philistine and Co. pulled up at the light just outside of the Pork N Bean projects with the tinted windows slightly cracked lookin’ for those Texas boyz. All of sudden some dusty braids came out of the bushes on them. Kawhi Leonard put 20 into the driver’s side door and grabbed 14 off of the glass. Tony Parker took care of the passenger side with 19 as ole Tim Duncan hit the back window with 10 and took 11 off of the bumper. Patty Mills waited for boyz to start bailin’ from the ride when he unloaded 14 from the bench across the street.
The Spurs completely destroyed these boyz on the glass 44-27 and shot 57 percent for the night. It didn’t matter that they were in foreign territory playboy! They knew the layout of the projects, came in and took what the Heat swiped from them a year ago. They squandered off two in a row in last year’s Finals in Miami and had to live with it the entire year. Now they’re on their way back to the crib with sneakers, jewelry, work and a 3-1 lead.
The Heat looked like some suckas all night because they, like my man Robert Frost said earlier, acquiesce! They just took the carjackin’ without a fight! The only dun in the ride that tried to fight for his was LeBron. He hit them with 28 comin’ out of the driver’s seat but he had the bubble guts and that slowed him down. I know y’all saw that dun run to the toilet in the middle of the fight bruh? That can mess a boy up! I’m talkin’ about the Spurs not the Heat. How do you take a cat that says in the middle of a robbery, “Timeout bruh! I gotta use the bathroom! Fa real!!!” Wheredeydodatat?
Chris Bosh was somewhat shaky with 12 but D. Wade’s joint kept misfirin’ at the rim because he had no legs! At one point this cat was 1 of 10 from the passenger side. He finished 3 of 13 shootin’ and 10 freakin’ points as his boyz were gettin’ destroyed in the middle of the street. Mario Chalmers was hidin’ in the trunk and only gave ‘em 4 and Rashard Lewis jumped out of ride like Tre’ before it even popped off because he only put up 2 for the night! And he shot them gettin’ out the ride because his gun went off like Plaxico's.
I’ve been tellin’ boyz for two years now that the only dun in the car that had somewhere to go was LeBron! Everybody else includin’ D. Wade has already over achieved in life so there wasn’t a sense of urgency to keep gettin’ to their destination and it was clear last night playboy. Overachieved? Am I lyin’?
Everybody but LeBron has done more in life than anyone EVER expected. When D. Wade came out of Marquette there was no expectation for him to win anything and for nobody else in the ride for that matter. Wade has won three joints and the vast majority of the other cats have two. They’ve got bread and fame that they never in their wildest dreams could’ve imagined! They got broads that boys dream about. Have you seen Chris Bosh's wife? Have you seen Chris Bosh?
LeBron is the only cat that had expectations put on him to win multiple championships even before he got caught up in the hype and said, “Not four, not five , not six, not seven….!” because they had already labeled him the “Chosen One” at eighteen playboy and now he's carryin' these boyz.
It's like Cleveland all over again! This dun score 19 of Miami's 21 points in the third quarter! While D. Wade is out there lookin' like the cat that shows up at the park in work boots, blue jeans and a freakin' work shirt with his name on it with a gang of keys hangin' off of his belt.
So when a better TEAM shows up and punches them in the mouth in the Finals they immediately fall out! San Antonio has been like a well-oiled machine in these playoffs. Pop has these boyz purrin’ like a kitten. They’ve got the most wins in the postseason by 15 points than any other team in history at 11 surpassin’ the ’84 Lakers. They’re also second only to the ’84 Lakers in shootin’ percentage at .542 in the Finals. No team has ever overcome a 3-1 deficit in the Finals and the way the Heat are playin’ right now pimpin’ it ain’t gonna happen this year.
If they can find some intestinal fortitude on Sunday and win in San Antone like the locals say. They could possibly push this joint to seven because it’s one, one, one now. They’ll come back to South Beach for Game 6 but I doubt these boyz have the heart to even imagine that scenario because they’ve already overachieved except LeBron.
I said before the series started that the Spurs had the better TEAM and coach but I couldn’t bet against the best player on the planet with shooters in the car until he looses. Now he has no shooters in the car and he’s got the bubble guts. So now what do you want me to do bruh? Stop me when I start lyin’!
Holla At Ya Boy!
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The caption under the photo isn’t real but its REAL talk!
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