Flodgin' (How Evan Turner got caught with his pants down tryin' to show out)

Ole girl: "Can you believe this clown ran out of gas?"
Evan: "Go head on with that camera dawg!"

I stopped by this little diner on the side of the road for breakfast and these cats at the next table started arguing over boyz being unprepared. Fred Allen, the famous comedian, said, “A committee is a group of the unprepared, appointed by the unwilling to do the unnecessary.” Ed Bradley put that dull earring in and said, “I will not go into a story unprepared, I will do my homework, and that’s something I learned at an early age.” Then Harrison Ford ended the conversation with, “I was completely unprepared for the public spectacle my private life became, and didn’t like it a bit.”

Well I wonder how much ole dull Evan Turner liked boyz takin’ pictures of him puttin’ gas into his Ferrari in the middle of the freakin’ highway yesterday. Talk about bein’ unprepared Joe? Perfect example of a dun bein’ excited about havin’ a new whip and swoopin’ up a chick and not preparin’ for the inevitable, runnin’ out of gas!

Let’s keep it real or all the way 100, whichever comes 1^st! You already know that dun’s been joy ridin’ in his own whip all day like a freakin’ kid that’s stolen the joint. Naw better yet, he’s like the cat that finally got his old man’s ride and doesn’t know what to do. He’s just ridin’ around all day burnin’ gas.

He been showin’ out with the fellas and his boy that’s been drivin’ for a minute keeps tellin’ him that he needs gas. “I got it dawg! I got it! Where y’all wanna go next?”  His boy: "Dude you're on fumes!" E: "I got it man!!!!"

Finally after an hour of just ridin’ and goofin’ off his boy tells him again, “Hey bruh you need gas. This joint doesn’t run on air playboy!” Evan finally gets irritated and hits him with the, “I told you I got it dawg! Who ride is this? Aight, then let me handle it.”

Then that bad-bad he’s been tryin’ to hook up with for months calls because she heard he had a new boy and wants him to pick her up. So that dun drops his boyz off on the side of the road and high tails it over to Shaquanna’s crib. He pulls up with the sounds bumpin’ with his swag on full tilt, leaned so far back in the seat that you can’t even see this dun.

She jumps in and he’s feelin’ like Goldie without the pimp suit or cup. “Where you wanna go girl? I got you all day!” She’s all giddy because she’s never been in a Ferrari before. Ole boy is like, “Let’s go down to the beach cuz I know all of the haters are down there. We can make ‘em hate some more.” She’s like, “Yeah let’s do that!”

Y’all know how boyz do when they’re fladgin’ too. As soon as he gets close enough for everybody to see them he turns the music up. Just as everybody turns around and says daaaanng is that Shaquanna? The Ferrari turns into Mr. Willie’s hooptie better known as Betsy. Now Shaquanna gets on the phone like she’s really got something important to talk about; and ole Evan doesn’t even want to look into the camera as his boyz that he left hangin’ on the side of the road ride pass laughin’ at him.

Who rides around in a $200,000 whip and runs out of gas bruh? And wheredeydodatat?

Here’s the moral of the story playboy, if you’re gonna flodge fill up before you leave and always listen to your homeboy because Shaquanna just wants to ride. Stop me when I start lyin’!

P.S.: It's about time somebody did something dumb in the offseason. I was startin' to get concerned! Hopefully there's more to come from boyz all over the league. Even the boyz in the NFL have been actin' like they've got some sense this offseason. What's really goin' on bruh!


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