Girl Snatchers



"Don't worry about it bruh, I'll take good care of her!"

There is an old colloquialism that says, “Dance with the one you came with!” Don’t try to find somebody else to kick it with once you get there because you’ll end up making a fool out of yourself. There is a reason why you came with them in the first place. Don’t start second guessing the commitment once you show up to the party.

The Michigan Wolverines showed up in Big D on Saturday night ready to dance and all of a sudden Mickey Mouse high jacked the coaching booth and started calling plays. The next thing you know Alabama is up 31-0 before halftime only to go on to put up 41 points in the Cowboys Classic. They completely beat the doors off of them 41-14. Actually, they could have pulled a Barry Switzer on them and put up half a hundred and gone to the crib.

Why? Because Bama was just better than they were but also because Michigan was in the parking lot trying to find a new quarterback before the game started. Instead of dancing with the cat that got them there, they decided to find some dun that could throw the ball. Denard Robinson is a running quarterback in a spread option offense. He’s the fastest player in college football (4.32 forty yard dash) and Mickey Mouse tried to turn him into Joe Montana in the first half without even trying to use his strengths.

Is the Bama defense dominant against the run? Absolutely! However, Michigan never made them get it honest because there was never a threat of Denard keeping the rock. It became too easy by midway through the 2^nd quarter for them to pin their ears back and put pressure between the tackles. Michigan never tried to get Denard going on the ground!

Some things you can’t change bruh, I don’t care how much you work on them. Genetics is one of them. You can not change the way you look I don’t care how much weave you put in or how much make up you put on. You’re either fine or you’re not.  Either you can dance or you can’t. Don’t spend a lot of time trying to learn how to moon walk , Doug E., break dance or Chicago step (bop if you're old school). You either know how to talk to women or you don’t. Your boyz can’t show you how to do that. You can’t just learn how to do certain things and throwing a football is one of them. Tim Tebow has been trying to get better at throwing a football for more than 6 years and he still can’t throw one. Denard Robinson is no different.  It is what it is.

So why show up to the biggest game of the year besides the Ohio State game in November for the Wolverines and try to grab another chick at the door to dance with?  In order to even keep the freaking game respectable they were going to have to do EVERYTHING right in the 1^st place. They came into the joint a 14 point dog, saw that margin and panicked turning the ball over 3 times resulting in 21 quick points. 

The Michigan offensive coordinator simply didn’t give his team a shot at even being in the game last night. The first time Denard carried the football he scored. However, they were down 31 points before his number was even called.

Did they not know that Nick Saban was a beast at game preparation?  Bama’s whole game plan was to take Michigan’s girl away from them at the door. Let's keep it real or all the way 100, whichever comes 1st! Michigan walked in the party with the finest chick in the building and just gave her up without a fight. How disrespectful is that bruh? At the bare minimum make Bama beat you up in the parking lot and take her.

I would have understood if they had been putting that thang on Denard in the first half and they HAD to resort to throwing the football every down. He would have at least danced with his date and boyz just pushed him out of the way. If that would have happened then he could have at least been able to look her in the face this morning. He’d still be a punk but he could have told his boyz that he got jumped from behind and they TOOK his girl. But to go to Big D and give just give her away without a fight is shameful!

P.S. Now before boyz start hittin' me up. I'm not a Michigan fan. I'm just a cat that is an objective observer that could see that they went out like some suckers!

Holla At Ya Boy!

Jay Graves

Get @ me on Twitter: @jaygravesreport