Members Only (Why Kam Chancellor is the dun next door that boyz didn'tlike growin' up)

"Y'all gettin' bread bruh? Oh.. I'm gettin' more bread too!"

As I was waitin’ to get my new whip washed down at Mr. Willie’s these three old school playas started arguin’ about integrity. Bob Marley pulled up in a Sedan De Ville with the brains blown out and said, “The greatness of a man is not in how much wealth he acquires, but in his integrity and his ability to affect those around him positively.” Thomas Monson, the President of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, jumped out of the ride with some pink gators on and said, “Perhaps the surest test of an individual’s integrity is his refusal to do or say anything that would damage his self-respect.” Then W. Clement Stone, the wealthy businessman and author, cocked his wide brim gangsta to the side and spit, “Have the courage to say no. Have the courage to face the truth. Do the right thing because it is right. These are the magic keys to living your life with integrity.”

Well playas…it looks like ole Kam Chancellor of the Seattle Seahawks must have driven off just before the O.G.’s started talkin’ because he’s not tellin’ his homeboys that are in his ears no, he isn’t facin’ the truth and he’s not doin’ the right thing because it’s right. Just before trainin’ camp started last week this dun decides that he’s gonna hold out for a new contract. Now I’m the first cat backin’ a boy about gettin’ his bread. If the owners and the TV networks are gettin’ theirs then the players need to get theirs too. It’s the American way playboy!

But here’s the problem pimpin’! He just negotiated a new 5 year deal worth $29.23 million in April of 2013!!! That means that he’s only played two years of the joint.

Let’s keep it real or all the way 100, whichever comes 1^st! Ole Kam is sittin’ around countin’ boy’z money and now he wants a new deal. Since the 2014 Super Bowl win Russell Wilson, Bobby Wagner, Beast Mode, Earl Thomas and Richard Sherman have all gotten paid. Now this dun is lookin’ at his bread and wants more.

It doesn’t work like that bruh! You signed a contract for 5 years not 2! You can’t run up on a boy and try to renegotiate because all the fellas just got new joints. I’d even give you a pass if you were into the 5^th year of the deal but you’ve only played 2 years of it. Wheredeydodatat?

Kam sounds like the copy-cat dun that lived next door to you growin’ up that nobody in the hood liked. Every time you get something new he shows up the next day with the same joint. You go get the Electronic Football game and 12 hours later he’s got it. You go get the new Huffy with the mag wheels, generator light, streamers and funky reflectors and 3 hours later he’s got it. You go get the Honda Trail 70 and 15 minutes later he’s got it. You’re rockin’ the new Members Only jacket and by the time you get out of the ride good he’s got it on and it’s the same color as yours. You gave him a pass on everything else but now you gotta fight a boy because he stole your flavor. That’s Kam Chancellor bruh!

Knowin’ that he just got his bread and can’t be happy with everybody else eatin’ too. That’s a sucka move if I’ve ever seen one. That dun wasn’t thinkin’ about the new Schwinn with the luggage rack until you rode up on it. Now here he goes! Stop me when I start lyin’!

Playas Thesaurus:
1) Whip: noun – luxury vehicle
2) Brains Blown Out: noun – sunroof on a car
3) Spit: verb – to say
4) Dun: noun – the person in question; dude, guy, etc. It’s whoever I’m talkin’ about.
5) Pimpin’: noun – the person that I’m passionately tryin’ to get my point across to.
6) Wheredeydodatat: Hood for, “Who does that?


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